text. un: allen.

[speedforcer]

okay three things

1) if you're from a world where central city, star city, national city, metropolis, or gotham exist
wednesday 6pm at criminales
we're ALL meeting up
that includes you bruce
BOTH of you

2) i need a dogsitter before the captain kills me and hides my body
saying my dog ate my labwork doesn't work
even when it's true

3) i also need a food technologist
it's kind of a long shot but anyone with experience making densely calorific foods?
i could use a hand with something

Comments

[atms]

Is that the universe where you have a goatee?

[speedforcer]

don't forget the twirly moustache

[atms]

[ he sends back barry's okcuddle profile image with a twirly mustache, goatee, and horns drawn on it. ]

You can't pull it off, so the odds of there being a universe like that out there are slim.

[speedforcer]

forreal
i could totally pull it off
i'd make a great villain!
ᕕ( ՞┏д┓՞)ᕗ

[atms]

Villainy, maybe. But not facial hair.

[speedforcer]

okay maybe you're right about that
iris held be under house arrest the last time i stopped shaving
and i
kind of get why

[atms]

Are you one of those that has it grow in all patchy?

[speedforcer]

not exactly
it's just kind of uneven
and if i try to fix it it just makes it worse




okay why are we talking about facial hair that wasn't on my list!

[atms]

Conversation flows interesting places if you let it.

[speedforcer]

i know but
facial hair
of all things??

[atms]

There something else you'd rather talk about?

[speedforcer]

definitely





do you want to dogsit for me?

[don't worry. he already knows what the answer will be]

[atms]

What kind of dog do you have?

[speedforcer]

dogs
plural
cb's some kind of poodle mix
and addie's a german shepherd
she's still kind of young though

[atms]

Yeah, no. Puppies are handfuls and I don't want to mess up my new place yet.

[speedforcer]

[nope. he's not going to say it. he's just going to move right along and talk about something else completely. definitely.]

she behaved for the other you
they both did

[and here comes the regret. so let's move right along]

did mick bring his charmander with him??

[atms]

His what now?

[speedforcer]

charmander
the pokemon
he had one as a pet


i'm guessing that's a no then

[atms]

If he did, I haven't seen it.

[speedforcer]

that's
probably for the best
though the little guy worked out great at the gallery

[atms]

That was the other bar, right?
How'd the Food and Safety administration like an animal in a bar?

[speedforcer]

rogues gallery
yeah
he might've been the cleanest thing in the bar so
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[atms]

Fair enough.
Is that supposed to be a guy shrugging?

[speedforcer]

of course
isn't it obvious?

[atms]

If you tilt your head and squint maybe.