wildkingdom: (don't you ever wonder how we survive)
Malia Tate ([personal profile] wildkingdom) wrote in [community profile] cuddletalk2018-03-07 02:41 pm

001 ℳ video ; @malia } { when you give vegan jerky to a carnivore ...

[Malia got super excited when she thought she got some deer jerky as a random thank you gift from the city. Then she actually smelt it and she was very disappointed to find out that it wasn't real meat. :(

It's not that she has anything vegans, they can do whatever they want with their bodies and their appetites and if they want to eat bird food then that's fine. But Malia likes meat. In fact, Malia loves meat. So she is zero interest in eating this jerky, thank you very much.

But she's not going to let it go to waste, either, and hey! Maybe she can get some bonus "nice person" points by giving it away, hence this video of Malia lying on her stomach crushing a cute plush coyote underneath her as she talks.]


Anybody like vegan jerky?

[She'll hold up one of the bags and dangle it in front of the camera.]

I got some as a gift from the city, but fake meat is weird. Free to anyone who wants it.

[Please take it off her hands, thank you.]
divaricate: starcandies @ dw (age of ultron ● 014)

[ video ] » username: scarletwitch

[personal profile] divaricate 2018-03-08 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
Well, that sounds horrific.

[Just keeping it real, Malia.]

I need to agree with you here.
divaricate: sways @ dw (Default)

[personal profile] divaricate 2018-03-12 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
I just ... am very unsure how that would taste.

Any takers on it yet, at least?
sanguinescry: (we’re ѕтιll тoo yoυɴɢ тнιѕ ιѕ тoo мυcн)

video; un: eunoia

[personal profile] sanguinescry 2018-03-09 01:48 am (UTC)(link)
( if she looks amused when her video pops up on the screen, it's because she is. Lydia knows how much Malia loves meat, entirely too well — especially venison, if Lydia's not mistaken — and to hear her offer out vegan jerky is more than a little funny. )

Ew, even I think that sounds gross. You poor thing. You wanna go get some real jerky? I'm sure they'll have it somewhere around here.
sanguinescry: (I wαѕ ѕo ѕυre вυт ι ғell ѕнorт)

[personal profile] sanguinescry 2018-03-14 02:33 am (UTC)(link)
...actually, yeah, that sounds better to me. We can just go out to dinner at the steakhouse.

Are you free right now, or should we just meet there later?

( Lydia doesn't really have a preference, but when she says "now," technically, that means half an hour or so from now after she's had time to make herself more presentable. )
sanguinescry: (вυт тнey ѕтιll cαɴ’т drowɴ тнe ѕoυɴd)

[personal profile] sanguinescry 2018-03-20 08:30 pm (UTC)(link)
We can meet over there, I'll swing by in a few.
duelo: (extra ♦ 60)

video; un: hale

[personal profile] duelo 2018-03-09 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
[ To say that Derek looks appalled by the idea of vegan jerky is an understatement, but he isn't actually surprised that she says it's a gift from the city. They screwed up his gift, too. It's partially why he hadn't gone anywhere near those damn wishing wells, because he hadn't even been able to get his simple request of his money from home without having to carry around these stupid over-sized checks to cash in at the individual shops around here. It's humiliating, but it affords him the time to volunteer at the shelter when he's not at work, so he does it.

Grudgingly, but still. ]


Gross. We could go for a hunt, if you want. They don't ever get anything right, do they?
duelo: (ι яєα∂ тнєм αℓℓ σηє ∂αу)

[personal profile] duelo 2018-03-14 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
[ Seeing the additional gift, Derek smiles a little. ]

Oh see, okay, at least that softens the blow a little. Yeah, he's cute.

You know, I feel like they actually have jerky subscription boxes back home. I wonder if they do that sort of thing here. It's like you get a box of whatever, samples or something of different jerky every month or whatever for like twenty bucks or something. If you find something like that around here, let me know. I'll get you one. ...maybe I'll get me one, too...
duelo: (∂σωη тнє вα¢кѕ σƒ тαвℓє тσρѕ)

[personal profile] duelo 2018-03-20 08:28 pm (UTC)(link)
It's worth a shot, anyway.

[ He might look, too, just to see if he can find anything she might miss. ]

Oh, I asked for my money from home. Instead, I got those giant, stupid checks like when you win the lottery. They're really obnoxious.
duelo: (ι яєα∂ тнєм αℓℓ σηє ∂αу)

[personal profile] duelo 2018-03-24 04:47 pm (UTC)(link)
No, that would've been nice, right? No, and they're not even like blank checks that I can take to the bank, they're like giant gift cards or something, to all the places around here. They're useful, but they're a real pain in my ass.

[ He grins a little. ]

I'm glad at least one of us finds it amusing.
fadingspark: (huffing)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-03-09 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
Is it even jerky if it's not meat?
fadingspark: (Default)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-03-20 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
Well, the bag is wrong. The literal definition of jerky is meat that has been cured by being cut into long, thin strips and dried.

Keyword being MEAT.
fadingspark: (Default)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-03-25 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah and they are all wrong.
fadingspark: (licking lips)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-04-06 11:47 pm (UTC)(link)
So why did the city give you jerky anyway? Does it give you gifts often?
fadingspark: (licking lips)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-04-23 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
Stuff? what kind of stuff?
fadingspark: (evil grin)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-05-09 02:04 pm (UTC)(link)
..... [and nope, he is going to just snort and start laughing at the image in his head]
fadingspark: (Default)

[personal profile] fadingspark 2018-05-21 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Please tell me someone's got pictures of that