text, un: eugene

[pureed]

What do you do when you have bad dreams? Is there anything that helps you not have them or to get them out of your head when you do?

Comments

[pureed]

Yes.

[fightlikehell]

That's-- [Crazy. Impossible. Down right strange.] It must be the phone that's depriving us from emphasis. This is coming off as exceedingly casual.

CW: vague murder/suicide reference

[pureed]

maybe not. I think I try not to make a big deal out of it. It was an accident that I ended up there but I deserved to be anyway.

[ He thinks he deserves it but he'd never been guilty of murder like everyone in his town thought but he blamed himself for the suicide all the same. ]

<3

[fightlikehell]

That's a very heavy thing to think let alone say.

[Said the Catholic with a secret altar ego that refers to Satan.]

[pureed]

Maybe... but God let me be there, didn't he?

[fightlikehell]

Maybe he wanted you to see something? Maybe it was a message.

[pureed]

All I've seen there is something that I already lived.

[fightlikehell]

Your suffering can't have been for nothing.

I'm so sorry that's happened to you.

[pureed]

It's more about what I did than what happented to me, I think.

You don't have to be sorry!

[fightlikehell]

There's more here, I know there is. I don't know you very well. This weighs on you emotionally. That usually doesn't happen with people that deserve the consequences.

[pureed]

Do you know a lot of those people?

[fightlikehell]

Not personally. Just in passing through work. I'm a lawyer.

[pureed]

You must be real smart, then.

[fightlikehell]

I know a thing or two.

[pureed]

And you are modest too.

[fightlikehell]

Just... trying to be realistic.

I'm Matt more than anything.

[pureed]

What does being Matt mean to you?

[fightlikehell]

[That's not supposed to be a loaded question. It feels like that.]

Doing the right thing for the right people no matter the cost. Trying and not giving up.

It's also part of my given name.

[pureed]

I like that.

[fightlikehell]

Thanks. It's sort of hard to live up to now and again. But I'd rather keep on trying.

I digress.

...so about these dreams, have you thought about maybe talking to a specialist? This has had a deep impact on you to say the least.

[pureed]

Oh... I don't know about that. I used to talk to my preacher.

[ Before said preacher accidentally sent him to hell. ]

[fightlikehell]

I meant like a psychologist. Maybe, eventually, you can find your way back to religion. I can understand why that wouldn't be your first choice.

[pureed]

I just don't know any preachers...I never thought of a psychologist. My dad probably wouldn't like that much.
I don't know if he always liked me talking to the preacher either.

[fightlikehell]

I'm sure there would be one if you looked or asked. It's important for you to take care of yourself, sometimes we have to do things we don't like for a better purpose. Self enrichment is a good reason.

[pureed]

Maybe...I'll have to pray about it.